30

let's see:

• move out and live on my own: check
• swim in Mt. Pinatubo's crater lake: check
• drive and own a car: check
• head my own department: check
• wish in a temple in angkor wat: check

everything in my tick off list for my 20's seem childish to me now. i was thinking those were the things i needed to do to prove i knew how to truly live an emancipated life. but now, it seems like i've reached the top of something and i'm looking at a whole new geography- an era that will decide where i'd be at the end of my life and who would be there with me. and on the other side of this top view perspective- i see my past. a past i'm glad to leave behind. realities that are hazy at their best that only certain feelings remain. feelings that used to be details and real people, speech, touch, scents, kisses, colors - a different universe.

who was i in the previous decade of my life? and who would i want to be in the next? i could perhaps remember to be anything i want and everything i want to become at this point.