our own revolt

the wash room at the mezzanine is closed so we go down the steep and never ending stairs. we missed the sign at the botom flank that said it was so. her bladder works miracles- transforming a glass of iced tea into gallons of piss. i wait for her outside the wash room for the disabled, holding the door closed. it kind of reminds me how it was back in the university. the state u's budget was too low, there was no money for locks on cubicle doors. we had to pee squatting, with one hand on the door. so much for the ivory tower that is the university of the philippines. the only consolation were the graffitti-blasphemous, subversive, apathetic idealisms and disenchantments. on cubicle doors, philosophies collide and merge and eat each other whole.

a dirty mop catches my eye. i cannot seem to turn away. oh, when will the flush come? then a slight nudge, and i let her out. salvation comes in pockets like this.

at the daquiri where he drinks his bottled water, an unlit zig waits for me. tucked snugly in a crevice on the ashtray. he changed his mind about smoking half of it while he waited for us-it was supposed to be something to do with his hand.

europe 2007. it has become a brand name for us. a goal to mark the end of a chapter in our lives- something to do before we hit our 30's. europe 2007, even if we have to sell our kidneys, portions of our livers, and slave over copies for american and german companies. we'll run around europe brandishing our third world pride. xda's and pradas in tow- all the trappings peso can buy. yes, we are that species of filipinos: overachieving, overtly intelligent, and grossly underpaid corporate slaves- even in the standards of multi million multinationals. and we do work for the industry leaders. such injustice.

we pay for the education, healthcare, and pension of the millions of unemployed countrymen. we dish out 33% of our wages for infrastructures that government officials milk for their election funds. and yes, we are the stubborn bunch who do not want to leave this country, despite and inspite of everything ugly and dirty. we stare at ugly and dirty everyday and we haven't lost our appetite.

europe 2007 will be the proudest thing we'll do. yes, we come from a country with about 60% living below poverty level, 30% struggling to break even, and 10% driving their jaguars and going home to fully airconditioned mansions, whose concept of starvation is culled from bad advises on dieting.

this is a country with two economies. and in this dichotomy we create our own sphere. we down $3 coffees to while away the time, eat a plate of salad costing as much dinner for two families in the nearby slums. and we read nobel prize winners and booker awardees even when somewhere in the country, public schools do not have textbooks.

europe 2007. we only live once and we refuse to be in the underbelly of this lopsided world.

now, who wants a kidney?